Men Behaving Badly…Again

Don’t let the headline fool you. I know some good, quality men who I hold in high esteem and view with great affection. But of course, this post is not about them. It’s about the now-former head of the International Monetary Fund, the former Governor of Cally-forn-ya (as he would say) and oh, I don’t know those rape cops in New York. What do all of these scenarios have in common? Did you say…”power differential”? Oh good, I always knew I had super smart readers.

In the same breath that many people learning of these three cases might have said., “That’s horrible!” I would bet buco bucks that the thought of “She’s probably after money” crept in the back part of your brain. It’s human. I get it. We are a cynical society at this point. We get the crap kicked out of us by the evening news and the day’s headlines. But let me ask you this: Who better to do what these men did than someone in a position of power?  Who better? They have more money, better lawyers, a cadre of ass-kissers who will line right up in their corner because they themselves probably live off that person’s fame and/or wealth. (I am curious to find out what the true scenario was with Arnold’s maid. If Arnold propositioned her, if he made advances given his history of groping).

All of these instances remind me of the reason I felt ok going to Marco’s place alone. Everyone knew him. I felt safe in that. Told myself “he wouldn’t dare risk his reputation!” “He wouldn’t be so stupid”…not realizing those were the very reasons he probably felt so emboldened.

If we’ve been reminded of anything this week, it’s that so many men are stupid and yet, they’re not. Stupid to risk their fortune, reputation and families for sex. For the simple act of In and Out. But smart enough to know that 9 times out of 10, they get away with it because the fall out is way worse for the woman. Right now, there is a maid from Guinea under police protection to stay safe from French political operatives, there is a young executive awaiting a jury’s verdict and the police department’s fraternal wrath on two cops who just stink of dishonesty and depravity, and there’s a child and a family who just had a damn A-bomb dropped on their lives. Two years ago, I had a bodyguard protecting me during a stressful and sickening trip back to Rome. And all of us suffered because these men just couldn’t keep themselves from “it.” For In and Out. I will never ever understand it.

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